Resets and Revisions from the Road

The adventure continues…

It especially continues to provide me with ample opportunity for growth! While I am thankful that there have been more times of gratitude, appreciation, and connection, my human brain still wants to focus on all the “hardships.” Since our brains are sticky for the negative and like Teflon for the positive, I have been practicing shifting my awareness to the positive.

Opportunities to practice this shifting awareness are plentiful. Day-to-day living in a motorhome requires a lot more consciousness than living in the comforts of my home. It’s funny; there are many times I pause and think, “I have a home. Why am I doing this?!” This thought most often occurs when I am strategizing where to find water to fill the tank and particularly when I am emptying the grey and black water tanks – tasks that I don’t even consider in my everyday life.

I recently needed to move locations. It’s not such a big deal in a car, but in a motorhome, there is a lot to do before being able to travel to the next spot. With everything secured and ready to go, I started the drive to the Harvest Host location I booked for the next two nights. The Harvest Host membership gives me the opportunity to stay for free, or a small charge for electricity, at wineries, businesses, golf courses, and sometimes family homesteads. This one was a family farm. The host let me know that they had some heavy equipment in operation but I was welcome to come stay.

I had no idea “heavy equipment” meant eight dump trucks coming in and out of dirt roads leading to the host. The first one I saw on the road blocking my turn onto the next dirt road and I was equally in his way. With that navigation complete, I met several more on the gravel road in and white-knuckled my way through it. Once settled there, I realized this was not the vibe I was seeking. The next day I had planned to reorganize the cargo carrier a friend gifted me. I had barely loaded anything onto the carrier because I was so overwhelmed with all the new details related to it, but I knew I could reset along the journey. This was not the place for a reset.

I decided to cut my stay short there and left the next day for another Army Corps of Engineers site on Beaver Lake. It is fascinating how I still doubt my decisions even when I know I can trust in the flow. It felt right to leave but then I second guess myself. I started calling myself dramatic and making other dismissive comments about myself. My self-critic starts getting louder and louder until it hits me over the head with self-judgement. It’s then that I realize I need to take a minute to realign, to adjust my perspective, to look for things to appreciate. It’s then that I can feel myself back in the flow and trust that I am exactly where I need to be.

And so it is… This next campsite, while a bit farther away from my friend’s house, turned out to be exactly what I needed. The large level spot was surrounded by lots of trees and off in the distance was the water. I was able to spread everything out and repack. The Mercury Retrograde in Sagittarius (see the other blog post) continued to support me reevaluating, repacking, revisiting, and revising.

Reorganizing and repacking

With the reset complete, I headed off to the next spot, another Army Corps of Engineers spot on Beaver Lake. I had already booked this site for the next 10 days. I arrived and again realized this was not the environment I wanted for my week of work. It was a bit too open, a bit too exposed, and the campers proved to be a bit too chaotic. Remind me to tell you about the family in the RV bus that was going through it for all the campground to hear. So once again, I revised.

Maple the Motorhome at Horseshoe Bend

With each reset, revision, reimagining, I am tempted to drop into overwhelm. Sometimes the overwhelm comes out of nowhere and I can’t process all the details. But with patience and persistence, I come back to my center and keep moving forward. I move forward into focusing on the positive. I move into a gratitude mindset. I move into a place of compassion for myself. Resetting the mind and emotions is taxing but well worth it.

This is actually a great description for the adventure so far: taxing but well worth the effort. It takes work to refocus on the positive, to train my brain away from only remembering the negative. I am so grateful for the rewards of that work – being in the flow, feeling the alignment while being in nature and continuing the adventure.

Beauty amid the noise